I love it when my old uni mate comes around to hang out. The other day, not only did she bring me a delicious freshly made coffee but she also spurted words of deep wisdom and brilliance that needed to be shared!
I told my friend - let's call her ‘The Sage’ - about some constructive feedback I had recently received about a piece of work I did. I knew they were well-intended comments, filled with nuggets of truth, but since hearing them I’d noticed I'd started becoming a giant procrastinator and excuse-maker!
Suddenly I was a prisoner to my own worst fears about doing it ‘wrong’ again.
Even my super successful businesswoman friend told me she sometimes struggles with a lack of confidence in what she is doing. In fact I have heard the same thing from some of the most successful woman I know – the fear that they might be found out as rubbish (even though they are actually totally brilliant).
And that fear can be crippling (stopping us trying all sorts of awesome things), not to mention agonising. (I’m sure this is a woman thing, but please male readers tell me if I am wrong!)
It is so much easier to fumble about with what we know we are good at and play it safe, or do a lot of planning and proposing and putting-off instead of following those little urgings tempting us out where its all a bit mysterious and unknown.
So what to do when you feel too scared to step forward?
Now I love a bit of self-analysis! I’m all about noticing what’s going on in those dark creepy corners we spend most of the day running away from! And the psychology behind why we do and don’t do things is fascinating. But whilst this information is thought-provoking, you don’t want to fall prey to the old ‘analysis paralysis’.
You can ponder the 'whys' and plan the 'whats' until the cows come home. But at the end of the day you still have to act!
And when I told my friend Sage-o I had been putting off my next move, she gave me some great advice, she said:
“Jan, you just have to suck it up and start it.”
And she is so right! Even if you feel scared and you aren’t 100% sure you are doing the right thing, or a thing right, the worse thing you can do is no-thing!
At least if you act, you can get some feedback.
Especially if you are trying something new - you won’t do it perfect, or right or even probably that well to start with. But at least you have somewhere to step from next. Then you can reflect, make adjustments and try again.
And every time you act, you are slowly moving yourself from here to wherever you wish to be. Instead of existing in stagnantsville (which lets face it, is about as depressing as it sounds).
So this week I have a challenge for you. To take whatever that thing is that you are procrastinating over, that you are umming and ahhing about and trying to decide whether to do it or not, and take a punt and do something towards it. Anything!
Just experiment with going with your gut (even if you aren't completely sure what your gut is saying). Make a decision, take an action, despite your concerns, and then see what the feedback is.
As The Sage says - suck it up, start it and see!
I would love to hear from you below in the comments, what are the results and repercussions from following the advice of The Sage?!
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Ready for change, but don't know how:
Health coach, Mindfulness teacher, Mother, Bee Pollen consumer. "You want health? Well, health costs, and right here is where you start paying in sweat" (tee hee - actually its really rather pleasurable and fun!)